DON’T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF

The late author and motivational speaker, Richard Carlson, first penned the words Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff. Part of his life’s mission was to help people reduce stress and keep everything in perspective.

With this concept in mind, there are important things I want to be reminded of as I navigate marriage, parenting, work, and ministry. They are simple actions that anyone can implement to live a more intentional life and focus on what matters most.

If life has been stressful lately, please know you aren’t alone. We all go through seasons where we feel like we aren’t keeping up with everyone’s expectations – including our own. I pray these practical tips will help you let go of the small stuff and create healthy margins for less stress and more joy.

ALLOW MORE WHITE SPACE IN YOUR SCHEDULE

In the world of design, having plenty of white space is a must for businesses wanting to highlight their strengths without including an overload of information. After all, cluttered messaging is one of the quickest ways to lose an interested client.

So it is with life. When our calendars are cluttered with too many meetings, deadlines, and obligations, it doesn’t take long for us to miss out on more important things – namely family time or time with your spouse or friends.

If creating white space in your schedule is difficult, consider the following scheduling tips that will help you create margin for those you love.

1. Be willing to set your agenda aside for your spouse and kids
   
   As you know, children grow up far too quickly, and there are priceless moments we can never get back. Always make your family a priority and be willing to set your agenda aside when you know your presence is needed. This might include sporting events, concerts, school programs, or date nights. Whatever the occasion, you won’t regret putting your family first. 
   
   
2. Give yourself an extra ten minutes
   
   If you’re constantly feeling rushed or pressed for time, try giving yourself an extra ten minutes for all appointments and activities. For example, instead of scheduling a 10 a.m. meeting, put it on the calendar with a start time of 9:50. You’ll be surprised at what a difference 10 minutes can make for your mental health and sense of peace. 
   
   
3. Don’t answer every text or phone call right away
   
   Most of us live by our cell phones – checking them incessantly and never turning them off. However, it’s healthy to set personal boundaries in this area. In most cases, people can wait for you to respond. So, leave your phone in the other room once in a while, and schedule certain times of the day to answer texts and phone calls. 
   
   
4. Schedule time for serving others
   
   One of my favorite stressbusters is to get my mind off myself and think about serving others. Something as small as giving your wife flowers or surprising your kids with ice cream after school can help you prioritize those you love and give you something to look forward to. 
   
   
5. Treat your family members as if this were the last time you were going to see them
   
   When allowing more white space in your life, do your best to live intentionally in the moment. Treat your family members as if it were the last time you were going to see them, and you’ll find that other obligations become far less important.

DON’T BE EASILY BOTHERED

Are you someone who is easily bothered? When plans change, or things don’t go your way, are you easily frustrated?

Going with the flow is probably one of the most difficult things to master in life. Yet, it’s also one of the most consistent ways we can avoid sweating the small stuff and actually find enjoyment in the day-to-day.

Consider implementing some of these tips to help you loosen your grip on things you can’t control:

1. Refuse to let things bug you
   
   Believe it or not, chronic frustration is often a mindset – a mindset that says, “Things aren’t going my way, and I don’t like it!” On the other hand, when you refuse to let the small stuff bother you, you choose peace of mind over trying to control everything. It might take a bit of practice to adopt this mindset, but it’s well worth it – not only for your wellbeing but for your relationships as well.
   
   
2. Agree to Disagree
   
   From my experience, agreeing to disagree is the quickest way to diffuse an argument. Yes, there are some things worth discussing, but many things are better left unsaid. When you do need to have serious discussions, with your spouse, for example, make peace with the “bickering,” and let it go.  As Richard Carlson said, don’t sweat the small stuff.
   
   
3. Let go or reduce your expectations
   
   Letting go of our expectations doesn’t mean we never have expectations. Instead, it means we hold onto them lightly, realizing that life is unpredictable, and we need to remain flexible. As the Bible says, “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” (NLT) With this in mind, we can loosen our grip on expectations, and in turn, trust God will lead the way.

NEVER TAKE YOUR LOVED ONES FOR GRANTED

One of the top things I want to remember in life is not to take my family for granted. By valuing my spouse and kids and cherishing the time I have with them, I’m less likely to “sweat the small stuff.”

Think of it this way: Parents who are too focused on minute details are often critical and hard to please. However, when they realize that “messes will be made” and “the milk will spill,”unreasonable expectations are released in favor of building healthy interactions with their children.

Our relationships are the most important thing in life – first with God, then with others. When we avoid taking our loved ones for granted, our perspectives change from “every disruption is a crisis” to “I’ll take life as it comes.” So, try to see the people in your life as the most valuable treasure you’ve ever been given and be amazed at the transformation that takes place.

Here are few practical ways to be more intentional with those you love:

• Listen more than you speak and love more than you judge
• Appreciate every age and stage
• Show appreciation instead of criticism
• When speaking, speak softly, gently, and kindly
• Imagine someone else is in the room watching you

When Richard Carlson wrote the book Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff, he encouraged his readers to keep things in perspective and reduce stress as much as possible. I believe this is good advice for all of us as we allow more white space in our schedules, let go of the small things that bother us, and avoid taking our loved ones for granted.

ACTION STEP:

Decide today that you will stop sweating the small stuff and choose one of the above tips to put into action!

I enjoy reading your views and receiving your feedback. Your views also help to encourage other readers on the blog, so please do share in the comments section.